i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
there was a trapeze. enough said
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
