True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
