she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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