He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
