I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
