We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Blood and glitter go together right?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
