i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
