Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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