I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Randomize
