I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize