in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I'm way too hungover for life right now
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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