We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Randomize
