don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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