i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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