it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
