Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Randomize