I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
