He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I have fence marks all over my body
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
