fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize