How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize