Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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