I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
one might say we're banned from that church
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.