She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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