1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
