Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
