Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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