with your own penis?
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
accomplished twins. life is a go
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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