Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
