he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize