I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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