we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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