nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
