I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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