i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize