We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
How external is "for external use only"?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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