i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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