god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
