in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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