it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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