I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I think my vagina is haunted
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
