So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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