absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
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You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
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I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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