Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I am midnight drunk by noon
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
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So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
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brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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