just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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