My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I am naked and annoyed.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
