Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
