Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
