but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
please come you make the beer taste better
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I believe in your delicious
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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