Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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