You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize